Why My Boobs Are Just As Good As Kate Middletons

Yes. I believe this to be completely true. My breasts, which adorn my overweight, short, stalky frame, are just as good as that of the underweight and Katie Holmes-level beauty Kate Middleton.

Hear me out on this.

Kate Middleton. Gorgeous. Thin. Slight curves in all the right places. Her breasts are well covered. A sight never to be seen, but rather just imagined like the holy grail. The untouchable mounds of flesh rank in desire right next to the holy grail.

Me. A slightly above common pretty, with the standard “left one is way bigger than the right” declaring to the world that I am not a South Paw. Really, there is not anything special about them, except that they have tattoos, so a bit more of them are seen.


Kate Middletons boobs live on the other side of the planet and are guarded by whatever you call the
British Guards. Mine live right here in the US.  Kates boobs will never be touched by the likeness of a common man.

Mine are everyday.

I’m willing to bet you’ll never see a bored Kate prodding her boobs just to fascinate over that amazing jiggle they have.

I do deeply enjoy watching them jiggle.

While her overall presentation may look better, a boob in the hand is worth two in the UK anyday. Which makes my “possibly obtainable” (though don’t kid yourself) breasts on par with the overall amazing view Kate has recently presented us with.

Now that I’ve proven my ability to create my own creative sound logic, who wants to hire me as their paralegal?


About Eternity

34. Employed. Taken. Social Media Guru. Mom. Writer. Internet. Learning. Law. Politics. Philosophy. Planes. Flight. Tattoos. Piercings. Psychology. Love. God. Technology. Piercings. Conservative. Ish.

Posted on September 16, 2012, in Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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